Eek! Time for a laugh!

Oops. Just saw the headline of my last post, and realized that if one was quickly scanning bloglines or some such, it would be easy to interpret it as she *had* passed over, as in death, rather than *is* passed over, as in Passover. Much apologies to anyone who might have had a whisper of consternation.

Yet again I am reminded that even in Very Serious Situations, there is humor. Like last week, when Little Warrior was still in ICU. She didn't get to breastfeed for 4 days. For those not familiar with the whole nursing scenario, if you don't milk the cow (or the mama), the udders, they dry up. I could just imagine Little Warrior: "I go through all that, I get my abdomen sliced side to side, chunks of my organs removed, and you let all my milk go away???"

So, I was trotting up to the 4th floor at the hospital, which holds a "Milk Bank," which is a place where you can get some privacy and pump your breasts, then they freeze your milk. They have a lot of preemies at the hospital, so often the moms will do this, then the doctors request some of the breastmilk to feed their baby via ng tube.

So a nurse sees me one of the days and says, "Oh, Lizard Eater, your baby hasn't been getting milk, right?" That's right, sez I. "Not now, and maybe not ever."

Her face goes white and her eyes widen.

"No, no, no!" I hurriedly assure her. "I mean, she might go straight to the breast, and won't drink any of the expressed milk."

She looked very relieved.

You gotta watch what you say, in trying times, as Ari Fleischer told us. My father would say the same thing. (sound effects as we go backward in time ...)

It was the week before I was to be married. I was picking up my wedding dress and driving to my parents' home when I had a blow-out. This being before cell phones, I hiked to the nearest place of business, which happened to be a funeral home, where I proceeded to call my mother and let her know what happened.

She called my father at work. Her exact words were, according to my father:

"LE was in a car accident. You don't have to do anything. I have it all under control. She's at the Klein Funeral Home."

!!!!

Happily, I can report that my father did not have a heart attack then and there on the spot.